When I started The Unleashed Heart, I did not know I would become a facilitator for The Grief Recovery Method. The name was a transition from my previous website, The Unleashed Creative, where my goal was to assist entrepreneurs in brainstorming creative solutions to a pressing problem. I’m a solution-finder, researcher, and creative is how most people describe me.
When you look back on your life, are there careers or endeavors that didn’t quite pan out? What if, instead of looking at those moments in your professional life as failures, you viewed them as stepping stones?
Had The Unleashed Creative not panned out, I wouldn’t have reached out to a fellow entrepreneur to work with and The Unleashed Heart would have never been born. I also don’t know for sure if I would have found The Grief Recovery Method when I did.
When you think about your grief experiences, are there any that led you to make a change or a decision that changed the trajectory of the rest of your life?
Because we tend to avoid our pain by replacing the loss and keeping busy, we find ways to do just that. For example, that may mean moving, starting a new relationship too soon, or taking on another job.
Grief is in the Driver’s Seat
You likely have never considered that grief has been the driving force behind some (or many) of your life decisions. When I look back on my life, I know without a doubt in my mind (after receiving an education on grief), that grief caused me to make impulsive, big moves, and practically derail my life, too. In fact, at one point, I knew every daily drink special in town, had several fender-benders, and my license was one ticket away from being suspended. I also incurred credit card debt, too, and had zero savings to my name. I was sterbing (participating in short-term energy relieving behaviors) continuously.
Ways We Avoid Our Pain
What are short-term energy relieving behaviors (STERBS), you ask? Behaviors that are a way of avoiding or preoccupying yourself from your feelings. Adults STERB by shopping, fall into addiction to alcohol/drugs/porn, gambling, food, excess exercise, workaholism, gaming, etc.. Children/Teens STERB, too, with alcohol, sex, exercise, food, gaming, cutting themselves, etc..
The only way to unleash your heart, life, and full potential is to unleash your grief.
Rid yourself of the ball and chains of undelivered communications and pain within relationships with both the living and the dead. Also, fully let go by learning to forgive in a healthy way that does not require you to confront a single, living person, and that also enables you to forgive even those who’ve died. Incredible, right?
There is a method and a way to heal; however, you need to be willing to have an open mind and heart. In The Grief Recovery Method, you must be willing to confront all of the feelings you’ve done your darndest to avoid.