There are moments in life where we feel like we disappointed someone or even ourselves. It could be by not living up to our potential, not keeping a promise, or also feeling as though we let someone else down.
So, what do I mean by “fail up?”
Fail Up is simply this: when the feeling of a letdown, disappointment, failure, etc. creep in your heart – do something right then that will move you forward and create momentum.
I’ve learned a lot about the concept of “fail up” since I got certified in the grief recovery method and offering the programs I am certified to facilitate. You see, grief recovery services aren’t exactly like the Black Friday shopping years ago where people would line up for hours upon hours, nearly kill (or literally – I’m sure it happened) each other for, or save money toward either. My point is, is this is a service people generally have to warm up to receive and likely don’t know it exists. Which is why I talk about it 80% of the time on social or to anyone who will listen!
This is not an easy-peasy business to build. And I knew it wouldn’t be easy. But, boy, did I experience it fully and left my experience wholeheartedly believing in it! So, when I have days where I feel like everything I’ve tried has failed, or I feel like I’ve disappointed someone, I remember why I got into this work in the first place. I also remind myself of this beautiful lesson in perseverance (i.e., “failing up”), taught to me by my mentor, Sandi. And I grab my paper and pen, and I start brainstorming, journaling, and work myself through the emotion of it and continually grab onto the next best feeling I can. And, I always land back on hope.
Hope is what got me here in the first place. I had hope that I would find relief in my grief when I discovered the Grief Recovery Institute a year ago in January. I had faith that it would transform my relationship with my grief and enable me to live in the present more fully. I had hope of getting out of the rut, that I felt, grief was keeping me in all my life. I believed I was meant for more and that there was more to life than feeling like emotional garbage day in and day out.
Hope.
It got me here and it still, regularly, gets me out of my headspin of feeling failure to the point it paralyzes me.
Fail up and hope go hand-in-hand. Because without hope, I don’t know that I would take the actions needed that enable me to fail up in the first place. What I offer is more significant than myself. It feels like a movement. My pity parties aren’t near as long as they used to be in my earlier entrepreneurial years. I thank the good Lord for preparing me for this time in my life. My photography business gave me so many skills and knowledge that I utilize daily. I feel like I’m above the curve-ball. And finally, my heart has caught up to my purpose, and I feel aligned.
I can tell you, I’ve failed up a lot; there were a lot of stepping stones over the years. Perhaps look at the times you feel you failed and apply this message and see if you can’t begin to look at things from a different point-of-view.
Fail Up, friend. And never lose hope (my favorite-est word in the world).
